Let me preface this by saying that I HATE THE DENTIST. It’s so juvenile to say, but I hate the dentist. The scraping, the flossing, and consequently, the bleeding.. The thought of it makes me cringe, So you can imagine my complete dread when I got a text confirming my appointment for 4:00 today. I scheduled it 6 months ago, and now the time was here. So this morning, I bucked up and brushed my teeth about 4 times and flossed for the first time in… let’s move on.
During the appointment, the dental hygienist was asking me all about college and my plans for the rest of the year. I try my best to say how I’m waiting to hear back from the colleges, like I’ve said a million times before, all while she’s going to town on my teeth, scraping and brushing away. I will always admire the fact that dental hygienists can somehow understand what patients are saying despite the fact that they have 10 fingers in their mouth. There must be a class that you have to pass before you can become a dentist that teaches you how to do that.
After the appointment was over, I went up to the front desk to schedule my next appointment. I’ve done it many times before, so it wasn’t a new process for me. The woman at the front desk asked if September 10th, a date 6 months down the road, would be okay. Before I could say yes, I remembered that I’m not going to live here in September. I am going to be in Oklahoma or Chicago (if I get into a program in one of these places). 6 months until I’m in college, away from friends and family and on my own… It’s at this point that the panic sets in.
I still don’t know where I’m going to college. I still haven’t gotten into a musical theatre program. I still haven’t applied for housing or found out who my roommate is. There’s so much I haven’t done, and I don’t have much time to do it. These next few months are going to fly by, and I’m afraid it’s going to be the end of the year, and I still won’t have anything figured out. Everything is piling up slowly, and I’m afraid I’m going to collapse under it.
What if I don’t get into a musical theatre program at all? What if my dream of performing for a living remains just a dream? The main reason I wanted to do theatre in college is because I knew I would regret if I didn’t try. Well, if I try and fail, then I know it’s not meant to be, right?
All it took was a dentist appointment to remind me of everything I haven’t done and that I still have no idea what my future holds…
I would take a cavity over that any day.
halliray 